“Throughout history, it has been the inaction of those who could have acted, the indifference of those who should have known better, the silence of the voice of justice when it mattered most, that has made it possible for evil to triumph.” — H.I.M. Haile Selassie I
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Leadership
Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others. —Jack Welch
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Leadership
The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant. —Max DePree
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Leadership
A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves. —Lao Tzu
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Love
love in Dutch is beminnen, houden van, liefhebben
love in Finnish is rakastaa
love in French is aimez, aiment, aimer, aimons, amour
love in German is Liebe, Liebe, lieben, lieben
love in Hungarian is semmi (teniszben), szerelem, szeretet
love in Italian is amore, amare
love in Latin is amor, diligo
love in Portuguese is amor
love in Spanish is amor, amar, cari o
love in Finnish is rakastaa
love in French is aimez, aiment, aimer, aimons, amour
love in German is Liebe, Liebe, lieben, lieben
love in Hungarian is semmi (teniszben), szerelem, szeretet
love in Italian is amore, amare
love in Latin is amor, diligo
love in Portuguese is amor
love in Spanish is amor, amar, cari o
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How can you use little motivational
steps to turn around hopelessness? First
let’s look at what causes us to fall into hopelessness. We have our goal but it looks so huge! Lose 50 pounds in three months, save $10,000
in one year or turn your relationship with your teenager around. They are large goals, lofty and worthwhile,
but huge steps, which need a tremendous amount of commitment.
Let’s look at the problem of weight
loss. Spring is on its way and I intend
to be able to wear the clothes I wore last year. That means I need to lose X amount of weight
and couple that with a doable exercise program for me. I hate to exercise; there, I’ve said it. I don’t have the time or the inclination to
go to an aerobics class, gym, or health club.
I haven’t found any motivation that has made me change my mind. So, instead of following into hopelessness or
despair, how can I turn that around? Here
are some tips to help you take little steps towards your goal and turning
hopelessness around.
Remember to make small goals that you
can reasonably expect to reach. Weight
loss experts recommend setting a goal of losing 1-2 pounds a week. This is healthier for your body and helps you
create a timeline for losing the weight you are hoping to lose. Let’s say you have three months to that long
awaited cruise. That gives you 12 weeks
to alter your eating habits and start an exercise program.
You can start out with a simple walk
around the block and cutting out the sweets in your diet. Don’t be discouraged if you miss a day of
walking, or you cave in and have that favorite dessert when you go out to eat. Give yourself some room to make
mistakes. That’s why it’s more sensible
to plan to lose 1-2 pounds a week, than a large goal that looks impossible to
reach. Setting a goal of eight pounds in
a month just looks and feels more practical and it is!
Saving money is a big goal whether
you’re saving for retirement or to send your children to college. Maybe you’re saving for a special vacation or
to celebrate a special anniversary in a big way. The important fact to remember is savings can
start with the first quarter you put in a jar.
You don’t have to open a CD or start a savings account with a huge
amount of money. Start small; put all of
your change in a jar at the end of the day.
By doing this, my husband and I have
always had a tidy sum to spend on our annual vacation. One year, we were unable to go on vacation so
we used our coins as a Christmas fund.
We started small and have now learned to discipline our habits to put a
certain amount of money into a savings account at the bank. This is our emergency fund, and it has come
in handy a few times.
Here’s a big goal. Turning around a relationship with a family
member, teenager, or spouse. More than
likely, this relationship has suffered for a longtime. You know that it will be an enormous task to
turn it back into a positive relationship.
It can look hopeless, but it doesn’t have to be. Small steps that are obtainable will keep you
from falling into total despair and giving up on the relationship. You can’t reasonably expect to say one day
“I’m going to have a new open relationship with my teenager” when you haven’t
been communicating with each other at all.
Start with a small step, like listening to their ideas or thoughts.
Listen!
Think before you speak and control your emotions. My son had the annoying habit of lowering his
voice the longer I talked to him, the result was, I was shouting by the end of
the conversation. He would then look at
me and ask, “Mom why are you yelling at me?”
Bingo, he had pushed the right button and he knew it. When I learned to keep my voice even and not
raise the volume, we were able to communicate in a more meaningful way. Small steps can lead to larger ones.
If your teenage daughter is wearing
clothes that you think are inappropriate, it’s going to do you no good to
constantly nag at her. Positive
reinforcement can start out small changes.
You can compliment her on her hair and how nice it looks that day, or if
she is wearing a nicer outfit than usual, use that as an opportunity to praise
and give positive reinforcement. Be
sincere! A teenager or anyone else who
is on the defensive can always detect false statements. I taught my kindergarten Sunday school class
this: If you can’t say something nice,
don’t say anything at all. I think that
is true for many of our relationship situations.
So, don’t be discouraged, just look at
smaller pieces of the big picture. It
will eventually come together and your goals can be reached.
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There are times in everyone’s life
where they will fail. Even the most
successful people in the world have troubled times. The difference between
these people and the rest of the world is that when they failed, they used the
experience to better themselves. Anyone
can turn a failed situation into a winning one, if they know how.
Failure is not the end of the line for
anyone. When you don’t get that job
promotion you wanted to when your business goes under, there are ways to turn
your situation around. While you may want to cry and ponder upon the failure
for a while, you should not do it for more than a day. Allow yourself time to grieve a bit. Tell yourself that you are allowed to wallow
in your self-pity for the rest of the day.
Then tell yourself that in the morning you will push it aside and begin
again. Use these three tips to use your
failure as a catalyst for success.
Motivation to Do Better
When you really screw something up, you
may feel like you have ruined your life.
Students often feel this way when they bomb on a big test in
college. When these events occur, you
should not let them determine your immediate course. There is always room in life for improvement. You should use your failure to help better
yourself.
When you turn failure into motivation
to do better, you will find it can be easy to want to better your situation. If
you need to do better in school, make a study schedule to follow. If you need to do better at work, take
classes to make you better qualified in your field. No matter what the failed task consisted of,
you can use it to motivate yourself to get more done.
Redirection in Life
Sometimes we fail at things because
they were not what we were meant to do.
If you have planned your whole life to go to medical school, but cannot
get in, then you might want to think of it as a sign rather than a
failure. There are specific things that
each person is meant to do in life. When
something does not work out as planned or even when you fail at something, it
could be because you need to redirect your life.
When you hit a brick wall and fail, try
thinking about your life plan. It may
seem that a redirection is in order. Use
failure as an opportunity to look at your life in an evaluation manner and
decide what you need to do to get back on track. The track may be a different one, but it also
may be a more successful one.
It Doesn’t Get Worse
When you know you have failed and feel
like you have hit rock bottom you can always use the failure as motivation to
climb back up. Tell yourself that it
does not get much worse than the point of failure and let yourself know that
the only way to go is up from there. Use
the failure as motivation to climb to the top.
When you do this, you will see that instead of running from failure you
will look it in the eye and overcome it.
Allow yourself to fail without ripping yourself apart. Everyone
fails. Just take it as the worst you
have to offer and deal with it.
If you have failed at something, it is
very easy to ponder up on it for weeks, or even years. When you do this, you will find that the
failure can be more destructive than you ever thought possible. When failure does occur, allow it to be
destructive to your attitude and your life for only a short period of
time.
After that period passes, be sure you
move past it without letting it swamp your entire life. Your future should not be a product of your
failure. The past can be filled with
failures as long as your future is dedicated to success. So, use these three tips to help you take
failure and turn it into success. Once
you learn how to do this, you will never be afraid to fail again!
Three Ways to Motivate in the Face of Disaster
There are times in life when you will
be staring disaster right in the eye.
These are the times to either run away and tuck your head under a rock
or use your situation as a motivational tool.
When you are working with a group of people, it is even more important
for someone to step up when struck with a disaster and motivate the group to go
on.
This may occur in your workplace or
even in your family life. The motivator
role is one that can be filled by different people at different times. If you are overdue to take on the role,
consider learning these three ways to motivate in the face of disaster, just in
case the opportunity presents itself.
You will be ready to be the group motivator when you learn what to do
beforehand.
Be Confident
The most important thing you can do
during a disaster to motivate people is to present yourself in a confident
manner. If you are at work and your team
is about to lose a major deal for the company, just remain confident that
everything will get done in time. With
you putting off that confident vibe, your other team members will be able to
stress less and get more productive.
When they are working without the stress they will be able to accomplish
more and you will likely meet that deadline.
If you stress out yourself, everyone will waste time worrying and not
working.
If you are at home and have a natural
weather disaster or a family crisis, you will need to motivate your family just
as you motivate your co-workers. Your
family will need someone to be confident that no matter what happens,
everything will work out. If a fire
damages your home, be confident that you will find another place to stay while
the home is repaired.
If you are faced with a family death,
show how confident you are that healing will begin and everyone will be able to
deal with the death eventually. When
disaster hits at home, it can be difficult to stay confident. Even if you are not confident, just pretend
to be so your family will be motivated to move on and heal.
Lead by Example
A great way to show people that
motivation can help a situation that could be disastrous is to lead by
example. Show co-workers that even if
you are having a work disaster that you will continue to do the best job you
can.
By voicing what needs to be done and by
actually doing it yourself, you will be able to motivate them to do the same. When a team is lead by example they are
strong and more productive. The same can
be done at home. If your spouse has lost their job and you need to cut back on
unnecessary spending, show your family you are dedicated to the task by not
taking your weekly manicure.
Turn Up the Positive Attitude
It is proven that people can be
motivated when influenced by a positive attitude. Ignoring the potential disaster is not a
great idea. You can discuss it and be clear about what could happen if
necessary. However, after the
discussion, you should put it aside and get on with life in a positive
way. Talk with positive dialogue and
smile a lot.
By showing that despite everything you
will be positive, you will in turn influence those around you to be positive as
well. When you have a positive attitude
you will accomplish more than others with a less than positive attitude. Be sure not to overdo the positive attitude
to the point where people don’t take you seriously however. Practice adding just enough of a positive
outlook to your normal attitude.
Use these three things when you are
staring at disaster and want to motivate those around you. You might be surprised to know that while you
are trying to motivate those around you, you will be motivated yourself. Concentrate on these three tips and remember
to apply them in difficult situations.
Remember that there will still be people who need to worry or grieve in
order to get through situations. But,
there will also be many people who are motivated by your confidence,
leadership, and positive attitude.
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Parents may often wonder what could
motivate their children to do better in school or around the home. Many parents
turn to a reward system and use money as the main reward. There are a lot of
discussions that talk about whether or not money should be used as a motivator.
Some parents use money as a tool and believe it works.
Those who are against using money as a
motivator argue that it does not work and only teaches kids to work for things
that are materialistic. So does money work as a motivator and is it a
successful tool?
There seems to be a lot of debate
surrounding motivation and money with kids. Some say that if you pay someone to
be motivated, you are telling that person that is it acceptable to do something
only for money and not for their own personal benefit. Those who believe that
money works say that because adults work for money and to make a living that it
should be taught at an early age to work hard for pay. Most kids are interested
in money and when a parent pays them money as a motivator it can encourage a
child to learn about the value of a dollar and how to manage the money they
earn.
Since every person is motivated by
something different, money may not work for every child. Some people have
motivation from within or intrinsically. These people do not often need rewards
or encouragement to keep them motivated to complete or finish a task. They have
the mind set to succeed.
Others are extrinsically motivated, or
need outside forces to keep them interested in completing a chore or tasks.
These are the people that need a lot of encouragement, rewards or praise in
order to stay motivated to complete a task. Kids are no different and money may
or may not work for all children.
Using money to motivate children can
work if the parent chooses to do it as a lesson. You can teach your children
about saving, giving and spending. Parents can also give money to their
children and teach them about banking and saving their money. Before you decide
to use money to get your child to make good grades or to keep their room clean,
think about a system and stick to it each and every time.
Maybe think about giving a weekly
allowance or taking away money for lower than expected grades. In addition,
money is a great motivator when that is taken away as a punishment for not
doing what is expected of them
In addition, using money as a motivator
helps kids build up self-esteem when they can look and see the progress that
they have made. Money is a great learning lesson and parents that use that as a
reward can combine it with lessons that kids can use for a lifetime.
Those who feel that money should not be
used as a motivator say that children should not be taught to work for
materialistic things and that they should be taught to be motivated from
within. They believe that parents should teach their children to feel
successful without money and that money cannot teach them to be proud of their
accomplishments.
Parents who feel that money should not
be used to motivate children also believe that children should learn to what
their values are without money. They should learn that money does not define
worth and that things like caring, giving and their work ethic are more important
than what they can earn.
Parents that feel that money should not
be used as a motivator may use other reward techniques. These techniques might
include praise, encouragement and other forms of reward such as hanging a good
paper on the wall, taking the child to dinner, or even taking the child to the
movie.
While no one can say what will or will
not work for your child, it is best that a parent understand what makes his or
her child motivated. Money can work, but it can also motivate children to do
things for the wrong reasons. Using money to motivate your child might best be
used in addition with teaching your child about the rewards of being motivated
by intrinsic reasons, such as pride.
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Procrastination is a damaging
habit. It can keep otherwise successful
people from accomplishing anything.
Everyone experiences procrastination now and then. There are often events and tasks in our lives
that we simply don’t want to begin.
Procrastination starts at an early age for many people. Some children will procrastinate with school
work or other chores until the last minute.
Often, this results in the child staying up all night to finish a report
or other project.
Procrastination is particularly bad
because of two reasons. The first reason
is that it causes unnecessary stress.
When you procrastinate, you are placing extra stress on yourself. You may stress over the task each day until
it is complete.
If you are one that can put it out of
your head completely, you will still be under great amounts of stress when you
actually do have to get started.
Something that you might have had two weeks to complete will seem
completely overwhelming if you only give yourself 12 hours to complete it.
The second reason why procrastination
is terrible is because it prevents you from doing your best work. No matter what the task may be
procrastination will cause you to rush through it. If you wait until the last minute to get
something done, you will be rushing to finish.
Instead of taking your time to do your best work, you will be focused on
getting done instead of the quality of work.
If you want to stay more motivated and avoid procrastination, you should
try these three tips.
Make a Schedule
Those people who tend to push things
off until the last minute will really benefit from making a schedule. When you have created a schedule that breaks
up exactly what you have to do to complete the task on time, you will allow
yourself a lot more breathing room throughout the task.
By actually writing the schedule out,
you will be more likely to follow it.
When you break down tasks that you are putting off, especially if they
are large or time consuming, you will find it much easier to get started. Often getting started is the most difficult
aspect of it all. Once you begin, you
will likely sail right through. A
schedule will help you keep that motivation and get through the task.
Hold Yourself Accountable
When you notice you are
procrastinating, you should always hold yourself accountable. Tell yourself all of the reasons
procrastination is harmful. Note that
when you don’t procrastinate that you are much more productive. When you want to use others to help motivate
you, you can tell them about your task and what you need to do.
When you get off course, they can help
you stay motivated by reminding you what needs to be done. Telling others allows them to hold you
accountable as well. Just remember that
when they do remind you of what you need to do, they are not nagging, just
simply keeping you motivated.
Reward Yourself
Sometimes the best motivation is a
reward. Tell yourself that until you get
through the task you will not be able to watch television, take in a movie, or
check your email. This will help you get
the motivation and desire to finish the task and make things roll along much
more quickly. These rewards are nice
when you are done, but if you try to do them throughout the task, they will
only distract you and take up much more of your time. So, be sure to save the rewards until the end
to get the most out of your time.
Remember that procrastination is
something that can hold you back from better things. To avoid it, be sure you
make a schedule, tell others and hold yourself accountable, and reward yourself
for positive behavior. When it comes to
doing difficult tasks, no one wants to get started.
There are often times in life where we
must do things we don’t want to do. It
is during these times that procrastination creeps up slowly. Recognize when it begins and know how to
stomp it out before it takes over. When
you do this, you will find that your motivation is steady and that you can do
anything you want to do!
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People tend to be creatures of habit.
We do not look forward to changes and usually changes in our lives or daily
routines can upset our balance. Children are especially upset with changes in
daily routine. Ever seen a two year old without an afternoon nap? Adults are no
different. Changes are however, a part of life. Changes can be good, though.
Changes are often the reason why many people are motivated.
Many people are motivated by changes in
their lives. The changes they experience might be small, such as adding a new
pet to the family or getting a new hair cut or style. Or, there could be more
life-changing experiences such as moving, getting married or having a baby.
Some changes can cause serious stress in emotions and people can become
resistance to change. There are ways to channel the emotions surrounding a
change and become more motivated.
Change can get you motivated to
something or change something in your life. By definition, motivation means the
mental force that causes change or the reason why a person works towards a goal
or accomplishment. It is usually agreed that unsatisfied needs or situations
causes people to become motivated. A change that can cause a person to become
more motivated to do something that is beneficial is desirable. For example, if
you just had your first baby, you may find that this life-changing event is the
perfect time to motivate yourself to change careers or to save money so that
you can stay at home.
Maybe you get laid off from your job
and suddenly find yourself unemployed. This change in your life, while it can
be quite stressful and upsetting, can motivate you to change careers or go back
to school to further your education. Many people will tell you that they are
motivated to do something because there has been some kind of change in their
life.
After you have realized that you have
the perfect opportunity to change or to get yourself motivated to change, you have
seized the moment. If you do not take the time and motivate yourself right
away, you might find that your motivation will slip away. It is very important
use the opportunity from this change in your life and makes a difference in
your life and those around you. Even if you are dealing with small changes in
your life, these can still be used to motivate you to make even more changes
that will benefit.
Another reason why change can motivate
people is because change often causes stress. Stress is very real and some
people have a difficult time dealing with the stress. When a person experiences
a change in their life, they can be very resistant. Usually, change is coupled
with a fear of the unknown or the unexpected.
Every person is different when they deal
with change. Those who are easily motivated by change are able to perceive
change and channel that energy in a positive way. Those who have difficulty
with change are usually not well equipped to deal well with that change in
their lives. As a result they may not be motivated at all.
Some people are better equipped to deal
with change when they know what to expect out of a situation. For these people,
their motivation may come out of learning what changes they will face. One
example might be moving. If a person lives in one city all of their life, they
may not want to move and resist moving to another area. They might be motivated
to research the area where they are moving to so that they can deal better with
the change of a new place or city. Because motivation comes in many different
forms, change is one way many people will be motivated.
Another type of change that can cause a
person to be motivated is when someone is asked to change his or her opinion or
point of view about a certain subject. Most people are extremely resistant to
changing their thought patterns and onions. When they are asked to do so, some
people may immediately shut down. Others that are better equipped to deal with
changes may be motivated to look at another point of view more objectively.
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Whether you are looking to lose a few
pounds, exercise more to get in better shape or to get your house organized,
the key to motivation is creating a sense of purpose. Without having a sense of
purpose, motivation is difficult. Without a purpose, your goals are not clear
and your end result that you are working towards will be harder to reach. Many
different things may motivate a person, but the reason why they are motivated
is usually because they have some sort of purpose.
Some sort of goals, incentives or even
the character of the person is usually what motivates a person to do what he or
she does. One person may be motivated, or strive, to get good grades because
they need a high GPA, while another person may be motivated to earn high marks
because they will get money from a parent. Everybody is motivated by something
different. That is the same for any kind of goal. Someone may want to lose
weight because their high school reunion is around the corner, while another
may want to shed those extra pounds to feel better.
Oftentimes, when a person creates a
firm sense of purpose, or a clear reason, the end result is easier to
reach. Clear goals and understanding why
you want to motivate yourself can be the easiest way to get motivated to do
nearly anything. When you get ready to work on accomplishing a goal and understand
your purpose for doing so, it will help you achieve your goal.
Think about what motivates you and then
you can easily find ways to help yourself along the way. Make a list of small
things that you could use for motivation. These could be rewards or incentives
that could range from a new book to a new dress.
There are a few key tips on how
creating a sense of purpose can help you motivate yourself. When you do not
feel motivated to do something, you can create a sense of purpose by thinking
of want you want to achieve. It could be something very small, such as washing
your car, or something much bigger, such as buying a new house.
Whatever your idea is, you need to have
a clear purpose in mind. Perhaps your purpose for accomplishing this goal is to
better yourself, many it will improve the lives of others or maybe it is a way
to be more efficient or make more money. Your purpose is an important way to
motivate yourself.
Another way to keep your purpose in
mind and to keep yourself motivated is to write a list or journal of goals that
will help you reach your end result. If you want to exercise more, perhaps
keeping a journal of what kind of exercise you do and how long will help you
keep a clear picture in your mind.
Your motivation and purpose could be
spurred each day by looking at your exercise log. If you are trying to reach a
large goal, such as losing twenty pounds, you will start by making small
changes each day. These small changes are your goals that will lead you to your
successful weight loss.
Rewarding yourself for reaching your
small goals along the way is another great motivational tool. After you have
thought about your purpose for wanting to do something, think about what you
would enjoy as a reward. Often, small rewards can motivate and help make your
end goal easier to accomplish.
Having a clear purpose for an end
result gives you the clarity you need to become motivated. Without this
clarity, motivation is near impossible to achieve. Understanding purpose which
means, who, what, where and why of your motivation gives you the key confidence
needed to meet your goals.
In addition, without a clear purpose,
your motivation will sag when your work becomes difficult. You lose sight of
why you are doing whatever it is that you are striving to accomplish. You can
easily give up and you no longer have in sight what your end result can or will
be. Understanding your goals, your reason for what you are working for all
creates a clear sense of purpose. This makes motivating yourself so much easier
and will help you reach your mission much faster and easier than without a
clear purpose.
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What is motivation and why does it
work? That’s a good question and one I
will look at in this article. Motivation
is that little push or nudge you need to keep working toward a desired
end. Motivation works in many ways and
for nearly any situation. You can
motivate children, adults, employees, and you to reach set goals.
B.C. Forbes quotes, “History has
demonstrated that the most notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking
obstacles before they triumphed. They
won because they refused to be discouraged by their defeats.” I love that quote, it says to me that others
have traveled this road and obstacles are there for anyone. If you want to get to your final goal, you
must be strong enough to work your way around or over them.
Motivation is often based on
emotions. Motivation is important to all
of us because it is involved with all learned responses. Physical motivation can be hunger, thirst, or
anything else that deals with our bodies.
The motivation to walk faster in a driving rain is to get to someplace
dry as soon as possible.
The need to provide for our families is
the motivation many men and women have to go to work each day. The desire to send our children to colleges
motivates us to start that savings account and continue to add to it year by
year. Motivation, although often
unrecognized is what is the driving force behind all of our actions.
Why does motivation work? I think most everyone has a desire to be
recognized as a valuable human being. I
was a manager for a year, and I can honestly say that you get lots more out of
those who are working for you by positive reinforcement than negativity.
Setting little goals and achieving
those makes you feel good. With our
children, it may be for the treat that is dangling in front of them. Eventually, those goals look a little easier
if there is something else thrown in.
How hard have you worked to win a game at a shower knowing there was a
little gift involved? One of the tricks
of a successful home party salesperson is to be free with giving away little
goodies. Isn’t it funny how we are?
Motivation works well with
children. It helps get them past a
hurdle that may seem impossible to them.
With a little incentive to work for that can give them a little extra
push to reach that goal they’ve been working toward. Incentives to help children reach positive
goals could be money for A’s on their report card. A special outing if no disciplinary notes are
sent home for one week or that special video game they are wanting.
With weight loss, it’s amazing what a
little motivation will do. If there is a
special event planned for the near future that is an extra incentive to lose
weight. If you want to be a knockout at
your high school reunion, then that extra push will help you meet your
goal. Going on a cruise? That is a huge incentive to lose those love
handles. Spring is on its way and I want
to wear those same denim jeans I could wear last year. That will be a little difficult unless I drop
the 10 pounds I gained over the holidays!
Business uses motivational incentives
to increase business production and sales.
Sales work is especially an area where incentives are used to bolster
business. I know of someone who worked
hard to win his big screen TV. My
husband once won an all-expense paid trip to Las Vegas. Incentives are offered to team members in
corporations to promote teamwork and a positive encouragement. Team unity creates happier employees, and
happier employees are more productive.
It’s a proven fact, if you like your job, you will be more
productive. A manager’s responsibility
is to help employees achieve their goals and goals are more fun to reach for
when there is an added incentive tacked on.
So why are motivational incentives so
important? I believe it’s in our human
nature to work for something extra.
Motivation will help us past the bumps in the road that stand between
our goals and success.